The Zoo
Professore Bossi of the Padania Zoo was very concerned. Anna, their one and
only Chimpanzee, was looking quite down, both physically and mentally. A
veternarian was called in to examine her. "Anna is quite distressed and
could very well die," the vet said, "as her normal pysiological needs are
not being satisfied."
"What is the treatment?" the Professore asks. "You need to get here a male
chimpanzee companion, else she will die," the vet responds.
"But there is no other chimpanzee for kilometers around. What can we do?"
"That is your problem." The vet then packs up and leaves.
"Fuck, what should I do? Where can I find a male chimp?" the budget minded
Professore Directore wonders.
He ponders this problem for a week, but comes up with no answer. Suddenly,
a thought occurs to him. What about Luigi, our Southern Italian cage
cleaner? He has his secretary call Luigi to his office.
Luigi, quite excited about what could be the important event that calls him
to the Professore's office, puts his sponges and mop aside, brushes himself
off, adjusts his overalls, and goes to the Professore's office.
The professore, at wit's end and nervous about how to frame the embarassing
question, hesitates and then says, "Luigi, we have a terrible problem. Anna
is very sick. The only thing that can help her is some male companionship.
Now this is hard for me to say, but I was wondering if you could, you know,
service her?"
"I don't know" Luigi says. "I am a catholic man. On the other hand, I have a
wife and a family to support. I don't have too much money. I have to think
about this."
"O.K. take a couple of days to think it over. We can discuss payment then as
well."
The professore then sweats out the next two days in anticipation of Luigi's
answer. Finally, the day comes, and they confront each other nervously in
his office.
"Well, will you accept my offer?" asks the Professore.
"I am a catholic man. On the other hand, I have a wife and a family to
support. I don't have too much money" says Luigi. "Before I can decide, I
need to know one thing."
"What?"
"How much do I have to pay?"
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